Saturday, April 16, 2011

Ode to Mam


R.I.P Mam (1932 - 2011)

It was the deeply saddening news of my granny passing away which woke me up today morning. I was devastated when I heard it, although the news was quite expected, since she had been suffering from throat cancer from a long time, and no amount of medical treatment could prevent her from the inevitable. And we all loved her so much that none of us had the strength to tell her about it. All we could do was helplessly pray that she died a peaceful death, before the cancer pain took its toll, making it extremely unbearable for us to see her in the agony. Our prayers were answered. She left us today morning in her sleep. She was 79.

Regrettably I won't be able to go to her funeral (because I've still not completely recovered from my road accident), so I decided to at least pay her a small tribute by drawing a portrait of her. And as I started drawing, my mind drifted back to all those times that I spent with her.

I realized that I've never been as close to any of my grandparents as I've been to Mam (Nepali for grandmother). I would always love to just sit and chat with her (despite my broken Nepali) on numerous topics: ranging from family to changing times to TV shows to movies (she hated that Kareena Kapoor broke up with Shahid and hooked up with Saif). Her favourite thing to do was to sit on the veranda/balcony where she could watch people passing by. And oh yes, she loved to be photographed! She was always lively and bursting with energy. Even at 79, she would never fail to wake up as early as 4am for her daily morning walk while I would sleep away to glory (or on many an occasion, go to bed). She would even make fun of me saying I lost out to an "oldie". :)

I loved to tease her just to see her annoyed cute little face. She would never nag, or scream or shout. She was always calm and cool and would laugh uncontrollably while watching anything comical on TV or recalling her fun moments back in her day. Although she never read me any bedtime stories when I was a kid, I never complained. She would never preach but would inspire us enough just from the way she carried herself. I guess she believed in practicing more than preaching.

She had indeed lived a greatly fulfilling life. Loving family members, inseparable friends, she even lived to see her great grandchild. And she has left behind enough values and morals for us to follow up on and carry forward her legacy.

I find it hard to believe that she belongs to the other world now. I feel I can just call her up and talk to her. But then, that's not to be. So I console myself with the fact that she got to meet all her loved ones before finally saying a peaceful goodbye in the very place she spent almost her entire life in, Kurseong. There indeed can't be a more satisfying way to depart.

I love you Mam and I miss talking to you. Thank you for igniting our lives with joy and laughter. I learnt so much from you. I pray for your soul to rest in peace and I know you're up there watching over all of us. :')

And like you would always say "Anta ke". :)



Mam at Kaziranga (Assam), December 2007